Mom turned 80 today. And she ran off to Chennai a couple of days back, to avoid any potential hoopla around her birthday.
And I wondered whether I should put this news up in a public forum. But then, there is no other way I could say all the things I want to say to her, without either embarrassing me or her. So here goes...
Savithri, as she was known to all, was the epitome of hard work and perseverance. Made to stop studies after her 10th grade back in Madurai, she got married to my dad and moved to Lucknow for a year in 1956, and then to Calcutta, which was my dad's home base even before. Mom was keen to study, and dad encouraged her. She enrolled for private classes for her PUC, and then joined Shivnath Shastri/City College for her BA. Somewhere along the way, dad's business took a nosedive.
Amma would be up by 4.30am, cook breakfast and lunch for us by 6am, and be in college on time. And then she would be on her rounds doing tuitions to school kids till late at night. After BA, she did her BEd @ Shri Shikshayetan, and became a teacher at National Girls School. Her day was even longer now, finishing up like a tired dog at 11pm, in order to bring home the bacon. She battled bone TB, ulcers, osteoporosis, diminishing eyesight, all quietly, and with dignity. I am a better man today, just knowing what she went through to raise us two brothers.
Three of the four moved from Kol to Goa, (with Ravi my brother, staying back in Calcutta to finish his college), when dad was back on the rails with a great job. She "retired" from work in '78, and enjoyed being a stay-at-home mom for possibly the first time since marriage, before I moved out late '82. Possibly her best years of her life was after '83 when dad too retired - moving from Goa to Raipur to Hyderabad to finally Chennai, which became their home for the next 25+ years. They traveled all over India, and around the world, keeping in close touch with the larger family and with a very big circle of friends. Mom religiously keeps her diary, pouring out her joys, sorrows, and moments of despair and elation on to paper. Her diaries are possibly her most treasured possessions today. Her love for life that she imbibed from my dad is still infectious. My dad encouraged her to constantly learn, and travel, and be open-minded. She is deeply religious, but at the same time, very progressive. We have people from all parts of the country and the world married into our family, and she is great friends with most of them. She warmly embraced and welcomed her grand-daughter in law, Ankita into the family, a Marwari girl who my nephew Kartik married. And she puts up with the antics of her grandsons Karan and Dushyant with the verve of youth.
Amma, along the way, you have showered your love to all of us, like all ammas do to their loved ones. I of course have no ability to reciprocate with that same warmth or candour. Neither do I know how, unlike Ravi, to sit by your side, and talk to you for hours about all and sundry, or listen to your joys & laments, your wishes, or your plans.
But truth be told - you are always a special person in my heart. Love you. And may you stay the way you are.
Happy Birthday Amma.
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Inspiration personified..🙏